Get your friend to say something stupid
Being friends with someone means that you care about their well-being. This can often lead you to feel some obligation to talk your friend out of doing something that you think could be harmful. While this is a fine line to walk, there are ways to have a helpful conversation with your friend. You need to find an appropriate place to talk, be sure to say things carefully, and seek help from others when you need it.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: When you gotta question your own intelligence.
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- How to Be a Good Friend (And Signs to Avoid Being a Bad One)
- I always say stupid things at parties. How do I stop?
- How to Win Friends and Influence People [Book Summary]
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- Brilliant Ways to Subtly Prank Your Friends
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7 Types of People Everyone Wishes Would Just Shut the **** Up
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As a salesman at one point in his life, author Dale Carnegie made his sales territory the national leader for the firm he worked for. Even Warren Buffet , one of the most successful investors of the 20th century, took Carnegie's course at age Fortunately for us, all the same lessons were packaged into the now famous book, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Most of us don't. The book becomes another item on that backlog of to-dos we never seem to go to.
That's why we summarized the entire book for you. In fact, here is a quick snapshot of all 30 principles. To capture the full lessons behind each of Carnegie's principles which are listed below , jump or scroll down for quick summaries, tweet-worthy quotes, and practice exercises. Fundamental Techniques in Handling People. Be a Leader: How to Change People. Principle Overview:. World famous psychologist B. Skinner proved that an animal rewarded for good behavior will learn much faster and retain what it learns far more effectively than an animal punished for bad behavior.
Do you know someone you would like to change in some way? The only way we can get a person to do anything is by giving them what they want. What do most people want? Health, food, sleep, money, sex. Most of these wants are usually gratified, but there is one longing, almost as deep and ingrained as the desire for food or sleep, that is seldom gratified: the desire to be important.
We tend to take the people in our lives for granted so often that we neglect to let them know that we appreciate them. We must be careful to keep in mind the difference between appreciation and flattery, which seldom works with discerning people, as it is shallow, selfish and insincere. Day in and day out, we spend most of our time thinking about ourselves.
Perhaps your favorite dessert is strawberry cheesecake. Excellent choice! Now, if you were to go fishing, would you bait your hook with cheesecake? To convince someone to do something, we have to frame it in terms of what motivates them. And in order to do that, we have to be able to see things from their point of view as well as our own.
How can I frame this in terms of her wants? Craft your language to make it about them. But even if we are right, what does arguing about it yield? Why prove someone else wrong? Is that going to make the person like us? Not to mention, nine times out of 10, arguing just results in the other person even more firmly convinced that he is right.
If we lose the argument, we lose; if we win the argument, we have made the other person feel inferior, hurt his pride, and made him resent us. In other words, we still lose. What if, instead of arguing with someone, we admit their importance through appreciation? Instead, sleep on it. This comes off as a challenge. It arouses opposition and incites in the other person a desire to battle with us.
Carnegie tells a story of a computer department manager who was desperately trying to recruit a PhD for his department. He finally found the perfect candidate, but the boy also had offers from much larger and better known companies. When the boy told the manager that he was choosing his company, the manager asked why. The boy explained: "I think it was because managers in the other companies spoke on the phone in a cold business-like manner, which made me feel like just another business transaction.
Your voice sounded as if you were glad to hear from me … that you really wanted me to be part of your organization.
This one is simple: Challenge yourself to smile at someone every hour of the day for a full week. A person's name is a very powerful thing - it's an embodiment of that person's identity.
It's a reference to them. So remembering and using someone's name is a great way to make that person feel important. Calling someone by their name is like paying them a very subtle compliment. Conversely, forgetting or misspelling someone's name can have the opposite effect and make it feel as though we are distant and disinterested in them.
Remembering and using people's names is also a critical component of good leadership. The executive who can't remember his employees' names can't remember a significant part of his business, and is operating on quicksand. Yet, most people don't remember names for the simple reason that they don't put in the effort to.
We make excuses that we are too busy. We are introduced to a stranger and forget his name only a few minutes later. Next time you meet someone new, make a sincere effort to remember her name. Repeat her name several times and try to associate it in your mind with her features or expression, or something you've learned about her.
If it is an uncommon name, ask her to repeat it or spell it for you. Then write it down later so you can visualize the name too. Free Tool: Just as asking someone to repeat their name for the fifth time can be taken as frustrating, so can asking "have you seen my email yet? Carnegie explains that he once attended a dinner party where he met a botanist whom he found to be absolutely fascinating.
He listened for hours with excitement as the botanist spoke of exotic plants and indoor gardens, until the party ended and everyone left. Of course, Carnegie had hardly said anything at all. What he had done was listen intently. He listened because he was genuinely interested. Even the most ill-tempered person, the most violent critic, will often be subdued in the presence of a patient, sympathetic listener. Take for example, a store clerk. If the clerk constantly interrupts and irritates customers, those customers are more likely to start arguments and bring frustrations and complaints to the store manager.
But a clerk who is willing to listen could calm even a customer who storms in already angry. Yet, most people would prefer a good listener to a good talker. Remember that the people we are talking to are a hundred times more interested in themselves and their own problems than they are in us and our problems.
Next time you have a conversation, pay attention to how much of the conversation is you talking vs. How much listening are you doing? As you practice this, pay attention to what causes you to jump in with more talking. Are you filling awkward silences? Do you tend to get carried away when you tell stories or share ideas? Think of some ways you can encourage the other person to do more of the sharing. We now understand that people like to talk about themselves and have others be interested in them.
The next best thing to talking about themselves is talking about the things that they enjoy. Whenever Theodore Roosevelt expected a visitor, he would stay up late the night before, reading up on whatever subject he knew particularly interested his guest.
And that is because Roosevelt was keenly aware of the following idea:. Carnegie describes a story from a man named Edward Chalif, who was planning to ask the president of one of the largest corporations in America to pay for his son to go on a Boy Scout trip. Before Mr. Chalif went to see him, he had heard that this man had drawn up a check for a million dollars, and that after it was canceled, he had had it framed.
50 Funny STUPID Jokes Guaranteed To Make Your Mates Laugh
Did you just say something you can't take back? We've all done it at least once with a friend. These aren't momentary "oops" statements in which you say something dumb and hurtful without meaning to cause harm , but nasty, negative things even if they are true that you know are going to cause your friend hurt or heartache.
You can try to ignore what this person is saying for the sake of harmony and this will probably be your instinct, because we do all like to please people — and confrontation is hard. Racism is never acceptable and we have to keep the people we associate with accountable for their words. How else will this person ever know to stop, unless someone they care about pulls them up on it? If this is a stupid acquaintance, you can afford to be straightforward about finding their comment offensive. If someone you know has been openly sexist , call them out for it.
Way To Go: The Hilarious And Stupid Tricks People Have Fallen For
Marketing software to increase traffic and leads. Free and premium plans. Sales software for closing more deals, faster. Software for providing first-class customer service. Content management software to power websites. Premium plans and free trial. Find HubSpot apps for the tools and software you use to run your business. Read marketing, sales, agency, and customer success blog content. Hear from the businesses that use HubSpot to grow better every day. Create apps and custom integrations for businesses using HubSpot.
How to Be a Good Friend (And Signs to Avoid Being a Bad One)
And no matter how much you wanted to poke that lion with a stick, you listened to that person, because you knew they were right. An important side of communicating with people you like, love or respect is choosing the perfect words and phrases. Maybe even Like poking a lion with a stick. As I mentioned before, these proverbs are used as a kind of warning.
Last Updated on October 2, You might be a terrible friend and not even realize it. That should scare you. Really, it should!
I always say stupid things at parties. How do I stop?
My life has revolved around the two things I've always loved: whiskey and rugby. Now the marriage clause in my Da's will has me putting both on the back burner if I want to save the Murphy's Pub empire and find a wife. As the last brother to get married, I need a little help, and that's where my sister-in-law's American best friend, Leah, comes into the picture.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Frank Sinatra Nancy Sinatra- Something Stupid +Lyrics
Say "no pun intended" occassionally after saying something normal in conversation. Most people don't want to look stupid and will laugh awkwardly while trying to figure what the pun was. When they're talking to you, stop them mid-sentence and say, "Have you been crying? When you're talking to them, instead of looking at their face, stare at their ears. Look over their shoulder when they're unlocking their phone so can see their 4-digit code.
How to Win Friends and Influence People [Book Summary]
Uttom Chowdhury. This essential guide to tic disorders and Tourette Syndrome tackles problems faced both at home and at school, such as adjusting to the diagnosis, the effect on siblings and classroom difficulties. Dr Chowdhury offers advice on how to manage symptoms, describing practical techniques such as habit reversal and massed practice and reviewing available medical treatments. In clear, accessible language, this book explains the clinical signs and symptoms of Tourette and related conditions, and their possible causes. Presenting strategies for dealing with associated difficulties, including low self-esteem, anger-management and bullying, this book will be invaluable to parents, teachers, social workers and other professionals.
You think this is smart. And to a certain extent, it is. If you want to get through life without anyone disliking you, then buttoning your bottom lip, keeping your eyes to yourself, and getting on with your business is the perfect strategy. You can never say what you really think for fear that someone will disagree.
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You never know the reaction a joke will get. I was wondering why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger…. An old lady came in and asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Brilliant Ways to Subtly Prank Your Friends
Read through some of these funny quotes about friendship and see which one is closest to describing your friendship. You know each other so well that you can be simply stupid with them and no one seems to mind. If you have to choose between two friends, choose the one with chocolate.
The subject who is truly loyal to the Chief Magistrate will neither advise nor submit to arbitrary measures. This article was published more than 1 year ago. Some information in it may no longer be current. It seems as if every time I go out to a party or any kind of social gathering I say or do something stupid.
18 Funny Quotes to Send to Your Best Friend
Madison McGaw If you fell for one of the oldest tricks in the book, would you make it public? A Reddit thread asked people what rather obvious tricks they've fallen for in the past. And the responses reveal people just aren't as smart as they think they are. From basically giving their bikes and watches away, to getting hit on the nose, the results are hilarious and also, a little bit sad. I have, in fact, been looking for people to ride with so we struck up conversation. He said he lived around the corner and asked if I wanted to go see his house and he could give me his card. Standing in front of his house or should I say "his house" chatting about biking routes in the area and he asked me about my bike: "Is it really heavy?