Jewish prayer for finding a husband
Let us merit to find him, to come close to him and to hear Torah teachings from his mouth. And have pity upon all those who are having difficulty in finding their mate, in particular… specify the names of those you wish to pray for. Help them! We do not know, nor have we any idea how to really seek our true mates, for only You know how difficult it is.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: PRAYERS TO FIND A GOOD AND LOVING HUSBAND OR WIFE
SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Prayer For Future Husband - Prayer For My Future HusbandContent:
No, I Did Not Convert Because My Husband is Jewish!
The Torah provides very little guidance with regard to the procedures of a marriage. The method of finding a spouse, the form of the wedding ceremony, and the nature of the marital relationship are all explained in the Talmud. According to the Talmud , Rav Yehuda taught that 40 days before a male child is conceived, a voice from heaven announces whose daughter he is going to marry, literally a match made in heaven!
In Yiddish , this perfect match is called "bashert,' a word meaning fate or destiny. The word "bashert" can be used to refer to any kind of fortuitous good match, such as finding the perfect job or the perfect house, but it is usually used to refer to one's soul mate.
There are a number of statements in the Talmud that would seem to contradict the idea of bashert, most notably the many bits of advice on choosing a wife. Nevertheless, the idea has a strong hold within the Jewish community: look at any listing of Jewish personal ads and you're bound to find someone "Looking for my bashert.
Finding your bashert doesn't mean that your marriage will be trouble-free. Marriage, like everything worthwhile in life, requires dedication, effort and energy. Even when two people are meant for each other, it is possible for them to ruin their marriage. That is why Judaism allows divorce. Although the first marriage is bashert, it is still possible to have a good and happy marriage with a second spouse.
The Talmud teaches that G-d also arranges second marriages, and a man's second wife is chosen according to his merits. How do you know if you have found your bashert? Should you hold off on marrying someone for fear that the person you want to marry might not be your bashert, and there might be a better match out there waiting for you? The traditional view is that you cannot know who your bashert is, but once you get married, the person you married is by definition your bashert, so you should not let concerns about finding your bashert discourage you from marrying someone.
And while we're on the subject of G-d arranging marriages, I should share this delightful midrash: it is said that a Roman woman asked a rabbi, if your G-d created the universe in six days, then what has he been doing with his time since then? The rabbi said that G-d has been arranging marriages.
The Roman woman scoffed at this, saying that arranging marriages was a simple task, but the rabbi assured her that arranging marriages properly is as difficult as parting the Red Sea.
To prove the rabbi wrong, the Roman woman went home and took a thousand male slaves and a thousand female slaves and matched them up in marriages. The next day, the slaves appeared before her, one with a cracked skull, another with a broken leg, another with his eye gouged out, all asking to be released from their marriages. The woman went back to the rabbi and said, "There is no god like your G-d , and your Torah is true.
Mishnah Kiddushin specifies that a woman is acquired i. Ordinarily, all three of these conditions are satisfied, although only one is necessary to effect a binding marriage. Acquisition by money is normally satisfied by the wedding ring. It is important to note that although money is one way of "acquiring" a wife, the woman is not being bought and sold like a piece of property or a slave.
This is obvious from the fact that the amount of money involved is nominal according to the Mishnah , a perutah , a copper coin of the lowest denomination, was sufficient. In addition, if the woman were being purchased like a piece of property, it would be possible for the husband to resell her, and clearly it is not. Rather, the wife's acceptance of the money is a symbolic way of demonstrating her acceptance of the husband, just like acceptance of the contract or the sexual intercourse.
To satisfy the requirements of acquisition by money, the ring must belong to the groom. It cannot be borrowed, although it can be a gift from a relative. It must be given to the wife irrevocably. In addition, the ring's value must be known to the wife, so that there can be no claim that the husband deceived her into marrying by misleading her as to its value. In all cases, the Talmud specifies that a woman can be acquired only with her consent, and not without it Kiddushin 2a-b.
As part of the wedding ceremony, the husband gives the wife a ketubah. The word " Ketubah " comes from the root Kaf-Tav-Bet , meaning "writing. The ketubah spells out the husband's obligations to the wife during marriage, conditions of inheritance upon his death, and obligations regarding the support of children of the marriage.
It also provides for the wife's support in the event of divorce. There are standard conditions; however, additional conditions can be included by mutual agreement. Marriage agreements of this sort were commonplace in the ancient Semitic world.
The ketubah has much in common with prenuptial agreements, which are gaining popularity in America. In America, such agreements were historically disfavored, because it was believed that planning for divorce would encourage divorce, and that people who considered the possibility of divorce shouldn't be marrying. Although one rabbi in the Talmud expresses a similar opinion, the majority maintained that a ketubah discouraged divorce, by serving as a constant reminder of the husband's substantial financial obligations if he divorced his wife.
The ketubah is often a beautiful work of calligraphy, framed and displayed in the home. The process of marriage occurs in two distinct stages: kiddushin commonly translated as betrothal and nisuin full-fledged marriage. Kiddushin occurs when the woman accepts the money, contract or sexual relations offered by the prospective husband. The word " kiddushin " comes from the root Qof-Dalet-Shin , meaning "sanctified.
However, the root word also connotes something that is set aside for a specific sacred purpose, and the ritual of kiddushin sets aside the woman to be the wife of a particular man and no other.
Kiddushin is far more binding than an engagement as we understand the term in modern America; in fact, Maimonides speaks of a period of engagement before the kiddushin. Once kiddushin is complete, the woman is legally the wife of the man. The relationship created by kiddushin can only be dissolved by death or divorce. However, the spouses do not live together at that time, and the mutual obligations created by the marital relationship do not take effect until the nisuin is complete.
The nisuin from a word meaning "elevation" completes the process of marriage. The husband brings the wife into his home and they begin their married life together. In the past, the kiddushin and nisuin would routinely occur as much as a year apart.
During that time, the husband would prepare a home for the new family. There was always a risk that during this long period of separation, the woman would discover that she wanted to marry another man, or the man would disappear, leaving the woman in the awkward state of being married but without a husband. Today, the two ceremonies are normally performed together. Because marriage under Jewish law is essentially a private contractual agreement between a man and a woman, it does not require the presence of a rabbi or any other religious official.
It is common, however, for rabbis to officiate, partly in imitation of the Christian practice and partly because the presence of a religious or civil official is required under American civil law. As you can see, it is very easy to make a marriage, so the rabbis instituted severe punishments usually flogging and compelled divorce where marriage was undertaken without proper planning and solemnity.
It is customary for the bride and groom not to see each other for a week preceding the wedding. On the Shabbat of that week, it is customary among Ashkenazic Jews for the groom to have an aliyah the honor of reciting a blessing over the Torah reading. This aliyah is known as an aufruf.
There are exuberant celebrations in the synagogue at this time. The day before the wedding, both the bride and the groom fast.
Before the ceremony, the bride is veiled, a process called badeken, by the groom, or chatan. The veil symbolizes the idea of modesty and conveys the message that no matter how attractive physical appearances may be, the soul and character are paramount.
This is an ancient custom and serves as the first of many actions by which the groom signals his commitment to clothe and protect his wife. The act is in remembrance of when Rebecca veiled her face before marrying Isaac. The badeken is symbolic of covering a treasure which one values. The ceremony itself lasts minutes, and is conducted under a chupah, wedding canopy, a symbol of the home to be built and shared by the couple.
The chatan, followed by the kallah, bride, are escorted to the chupah by their respective set of parents. Just as one would rise in the presence of royalty, it is proper for the guests to rise upon the arrival of both the chatan and the kallah. When the groom reaches the chuppah the chazan, cantor, blesses him and asks G-d to bless the bride and groom. When the groom arrives underneath the chupah he dons a kittel, white robe, which symbolizes spiritual purity.
Under the chupah the kallah circles the chatan seven times; just as the world was created in seven days, the kallah is figuratively building the walls of the couple's new home. Another explanation is that the seven circles correspond to the seven times in the Torah where it is written, ". There are two separate parts of the wedding, kiddushin and the nisuin. For the kiddushin , the rabbi recites a blessing over the wine, and then a blessing acknowledging forbidden and permitted relationships in Jewish law.
The first cup accompanies the betrothal blessing, and after these are recited, the couple drinks from the cup. There is no requirement for a ring to be used in a Jewish wedding. Rather, a chatan must give the kallah an object worth more than one peruta, a small unit of value; however, it has become customary to use a ring. The man places the ring on the woman's finger and says "Be sanctified mekudeshet to me with this ring in accordance with the law of Moses and Israel.
After the kiddushin is complete, the ketubah , marriage contract, is read aloud in the original Aramaic text. The contract is then signed by two edim, witnesses.
The ketubah is the property of the kallah and she must have access to it throughout the couple's marriage. The nisuin then proceeds. The bride and groom stand beneath the chuppah, and the bride and groom recite seven blessings sheva brakhos in the presence of a minyan prayer quorum of 10 adult Jewish men. The essence of each of the seven blessings is:.
The groom smashes a glass or a small symbolic piece of glass with his right foot, to symbolize the destruction of the Temple. The couple then retires briefly to a completely private room, cheder yichud, and are left alone for the first time.
This time is also symbolic of the groom bringing his wife into his home. Yichud is followed by a festive meal, which is followed by a repetition of the sheva brakhos.
Exuberant music and dancing traditionally accompany the ceremony and the reception. Many Sephardic Jews , particularly North Africans, begin weddings several days before the actual ceremony with an elaborate party to which the bride wears an embroidered velvet dress adorned with pearls and other jewels.
Often, this dress is a family heirloom. After guests share a meal, henna dye is painted on each woman's palm, symbolizing both fertility and protection against the evil eye. In Ashkenazic circles, a bride-to-be visits the mikveh ritual bath with a close female relative, usually in private.
This unique anthology is devoted to writings by Jewish women. While the book spans four centuries, the emphasis is on recent decades, with one-third of the material written in the past 30 years. Ellen M.
The marital integrity of the Jewish people was legendary in ancient and medieval times, and Jewish family life is idealized even in these days of upheaval. What qualities make Jewish marriage so stable? Jewish marriage is not designed for the ethical management of the sexual drive, nor is it a concession to human weakness. Jewish marriage makes its appearance within the natural order of creation, not as a law promulgated by Moses nor as a legal sanction, but as a blessing from God.
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Issues in Jewish Ethics: Marriage
Those who are worn out and crushed by this mourning, let your hearts consider this: This is the path that has existed from the time of creation and will exist forever. Many have drunk from it and many will yet drink. As was the first meal, so shall be the last. May the master of comfort comfort you.
May 16 22 Iyar Torah Portion. You're Jewish. And you're single.
How to Find Your Soul Mate: Secrets from the Kabbalah
I used to think talking out loud to a theological being felt creepy and forced. My husband and I prayed together in our home for the first time on the day we found out we were pregnant. We knew we wanted to ask for guidance and health for our unborn child but neither of us had any clue where to start. Our temple gave us a book that we lovingly refer to as Cliffs Notes for Bad Jews.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: St Raphael Prayer For Finding A Partner
In the morning he'd tell me he had the dream again, the one where he was trying not to miss the flight. Last Shavuot I wrote about quiet revelations, and the way that miracles - and our destiny manifest over time - sometimes taking years to recognize revelation. And rebirths and returns and an opportunity that came from across the country. Sometimes, I'm convinced, that the noise needs to get louder before we know how to act. This is the mantra that fills me on days - especially the cold, grey dark ones - that I don't feel like going to my special spot in Prospect Park to say my morning prayers.
I Married a Jew
My husband's father and mother are Jews. My parents are both what Mr. Hitler would be pleased to call 'Aryan' Germans. I am an American-born girl, and the first to defend my Americanism in an argument; yet so strong are family ties, and the memory of a happy thirteen-month sojourn in the Vaterland a few years ago, that I frequently find myself trying to see things from the Nazis' point of view and to find excuses for the things they do—to the dismay of our liberal-minded friends and the hurt confusion of my husband. Here we are then, Ben and I, a Jew and a German-American, married for four years, supremely happy, with a three-year-old son who has his father's quick brown eyes and my yellow hair.
The Jewish view on marriage, historically, provided Biblically mandated  rights to the wife which were accepted by the husband. A marriage was ended either because of a divorce document given by the man to his wife, or by the death of either party. Certain details, primarily as protections for the wife, were added in Talmudic times. Non-Orthodox developments have brought changes in who may marry whom. Intermarriage is not encouraged.
The Torah provides very little guidance with regard to the procedures of a marriage. The method of finding a spouse, the form of the wedding ceremony, and the nature of the marital relationship are all explained in the Talmud. According to the Talmud , Rav Yehuda taught that 40 days before a male child is conceived, a voice from heaven announces whose daughter he is going to marry, literally a match made in heaven! In Yiddish , this perfect match is called "bashert,' a word meaning fate or destiny.
The Torah provides very little guidance with regard to the procedures of a marriage. The method of finding a spouse, the form of the wedding ceremony, and the nature of the marital relationship are all explained in the Talmud. According to the Talmud , Rav Yehuda taught that 40 days before a male child is conceived, a voice from heaven announces whose daughter he is going to marry, literally a match made in heaven! In Yiddish , this perfect match is called "bashert," a word meaning fate or destiny.
About once a month, in private homes in San Francisco and on the Peninsula, a group of about a dozen Jewish women gets together to pray for husbands. They've tried dances and mixers. They've placed personals ads and tried dating services. And when those avenues failed, they've turned to Torah.
May 16 22 Iyar Torah Portion. Why do we pray? Doesn't God already know what's good for us? Doesn't He already know what we need? Are we somehow trying to "convince" God of the justness of our cause? What changes through prayer is not the "mind" of the Almighty. What changes through prayer is us.