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You cant find a person like me

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You have a low propensity to trust — Our propensity to trust is based on many factors, chief among them being our personality, early childhood role models and experiences, beliefs and values, culture, self-awareness and emotional maturity.

The combination of these factors and experiences shapes how quickly, and how much trust we extend to others. Even then, you may only extend trust grudgingly or in small amounts. Having a low propensity to trust can hold you back from experiencing true joy and fulfillment in relationships.

Clarifying expectations is preventative medicine when it comes to trust. Past hurts hold you back — Hurt people, hurt people…those who have been hurt by broken relationships in the past often hurt other people in a dysfunctional form of self-protection.

Trust is as vital to healthy relationships as oxygen is to a scuba diver; survival is impossible without it. Feel free to share your thoughts and comments. What other reasons cause you to withhold trust from people? Posted on January 12, by Randy Conley. Category: Relationships , Trust. Reblogged this on KristoBrand. You missed trauma exposure. As a senior in high school I had to hide in an undisclosed location for an entire night to avoid being hogtied as part of a scavenger hunt prank that involved dozens of students.

All were caught but the gutless school administration punished nobody when expulsions were clearly called for. That hammered into my head the notion that people can get away with whatever they want, and the subsequent conviction that people are only out to hurt others means I will never be able to trust again, period.

Traumatic experiences have the potential to shape us in profound ways, both negatively and positively. My hope for you and others who protect themselves from future harm by choosing not to trust others, is that somewhere in your journey you will come to a point where you feel safe enough to begin trusting others again.

Hey Randy thanks for ur comment. Telling how eye feel. Letting others know when they make me feel good or bad. It others with trust issues. Because I trust me. Hi there I agree trauma exposure is missing from the article.

Administration and Management sound extremely lacking where you were. I know exactly what you mean! There are evil people in the world. I would like to be able to trust but when the same scenario comes around where I was betrayed before, I wait to see what the person will do if they will choose me or the perpetrator! Sometimes my emotions run wild while waiting to see the outcome. I am so sorry that happened to you. My high school years were also very bad because I grew up the scapegoat of the family.

They all blamed me for everything. Even if it had nothing to do with me, I was still to blame. Plus, they were all liars…every single one of them. I spent 15 years in therapy and still can barely function in society. I think I need to go back to therapy because I still have unresolved patterns of behaviour and trust issues. To me, trust is an absolute — there is no if, but or maybe about it. Trust is the truth in every situation where it is asked for or assumed to be given. To break a trust is treachery.

What is your obligation here? They completely forget or ignore the fact that it was a one-on-one conversation and that should be a strong enough indicator that the conversation is confidential. If the person in question had wanted it to be common knowledge, there would have been a good chance that there would have been more people in the conversation. Most people today are incapable of making that subtle little connection and that is why today, I trust no one.

Most of us fall somewhere in-between those two ends of the spectrum. Just based on your brief comments, it sounds as though you may have a low propensity to trust others and you have high standards as to what constitutes TRUST in a relationship. Trust is also influenced by the context of the situation. For example, I may have a high degree of trust in my auto-mechanic and will absolutely follow his recommendations when it comes to maintaining my car. I trust him in one context but not another.

Trust is made up of four core elements and this blog article explains them. It may be helpful to you.

I am the same way. I do have trust issues because every time I trust someone they let me down. I will lower my standards and still it happens. I do try to trust people and this always happens no matter how much. The scenario above would never happen. It looks like it has been a while since anyone posted here but I cannot help sharing my insights. There are different types and levels of trust. When you first meet someone they may become an acquaintance and a default level of trust develops, if the relationship progresses and trust is earned, both ways, they become a friend.

At this stage the friendship may be ended completely if either of you betray that trust. When you get to know a friend well a close friendship can develop, at this level friends can be more honest with each other and the friendship will endure criticism, disagreement and disclosure however betrayal may still end it completely.

This is where the heated truth can come out and the relationship will self-repair, even a level of betrayal can be overcome but the hurt may remain. If the betrayal is extreme it may not only signal the end of the friendship but initiate a hatred. Given time and true remorse this may be overcome as friends we love are something special, although the friendship may not recover to a previous level.

Often however the relationship will remain one of spite and never recover. Friends come and go and different people have different standards that they expect from a friend. Some may just be happy with the company regardless of the nature of the friendship while some will maintain expectation of a high standard. I for one would rather have a few good friends I know I can trust rather than have lots of friends, some of whom may take advantage of me. I find it hard to trust people because more often than not they just want something from the friendship without giving anything back.

Sadly, the more you are prepared to give, the less likely you are to have many real friends. Your comment is addressing a few intertwined topics: friendship, love, and trust. They are separate constructs, yet interact and influence each other. Your comments about love bring to mind the various forms of love expressed in the Greek language. And Agape love is the unconditional love given to another with no expectation of love in return.

There are different kinds of trust as well. Contractual Trust is a kind of trust governed by rules and regulations. Knowledge-based trust is a kind of trust built on frequent interactions with an individual that give you a certain level of confidence trust in how the person will behave what you describe as casual friends. An finally, Identification-based Trust is the deepest kind of trust where your values, beliefs, and intentions align with another at a deep level your most intimate friends.

Fact is, I do not have friends. Never had, not even one, after I was 8 or 9yo. Kids have no moral brakes when it comes to being evil. And I was and had ever been the strongest one of all. All that in a very short while. Then I probably got the victim mentality so bad that I had groups of people abusing me for some 4 more years.

I got fat, completely isolated and suicidal. That took years to repair, little by little, to only a good enough shape. Never got back to the heaven I knew. I had to make a choice: do I want to live or not? I wanted to live. So I turned all the hatred inside to the outside and got quite violent and maquiavellian for a good while still am considered a bit too aggressive. As said, I have no friends — so the people around me are only the women I get close for sexual reasons and some guys who do everything they can to hang out with me cause they admire me for whatever reasons.

Good news is that I myself Am quite trustworthy, goddamn. Zero lies. Harsh, brutal truths, if need be. And people mostly women even say how quickly they got to trust me and how trustworthy I really am. But I wish I could have friends — that it could make any sense to me to want to have friends.

But having friends seems a retarded idea. I cannot believe people do it. I appreciate you taking the time to share your experiences. It takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable and transparent.

Dating Tips for Finding the Right Person

This post is in partnership with Inc. The article below was originally published at Inc. Have you noticed there are people who always seem to be more likable? In a recent episode of the new ABC drama Mind Games , one of the characters mentions an interesting personality trait that defines the most popular people: they more readily admit their weaknesses rather than waiting for them to be revealed over time. Ask questions.

Follow artists to receive notifications and never miss a new release. Note: Your Spotify account must be connected to Facebook to find your friends in this list. Or, ask your friends to share their profile with you.

Being single for a certain amount of time has its benefits. I personally experienced the most growth and self-awareness during my years as a single girl, and while there were some painful and lonely moments, they all led me to a place where I could break through some of my walls and do some necessary inner work. We continue to live life in the same way and hope that it will somehow lead to different results. To solve a problem, you need to understand it.

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From the author of the million-copy bestseller The Girl With All the Gifts comes a heart-stopping psychological thriller with a twist you won't see coming and a heroine you can't trust. Liz Kendall wouldn't hurt a fly. Even when times get tough, she's devoted to bringing up her kids in a loving home. But there's another side to Liz, one that's dark and malicious. She will do anything to get her way - no matter how extreme. Someone Like Me is the intoxicating new thriller from the phenomenal M. A modern take on the Jekyll and Hyde tale, think Gone Girl meets Stephen King - but you won't have read anything quite like this before. You will not want to put this down' Laini Taylor. Fran Watts has still not recovered from a brutal attack and kidnapping by a man nicknamed the Shadowman.

How to find and add someone on Snapchat on iPhone or Android, in 3 different ways

It is not up to the person being blocked and if someone blocks you, you need to respect their reasons for doing so. There may be cases where someone blocks your for apparently no reason and you feel as though something is up when they suddenly disappear from your social media site. When someone blocks you on Facebook they effectively become invisible to you on the site or app — they disappear online. You will not be able to view their profile, send a friend request, send a message, comment or see what they have commented anywhere on Facebook if they have blocked you.

Get expert help with any negative personality traits you might have that are putting people off. Simply click here to chat online to someone right now.

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Why Am I Trying So Hard to Make People Like Me?

For instance, you might insist on becoming friends with a coworker who says yes to your afternoon coffee invites but bails at the last minute. Or maybe a friend of a friend never makes an effort to say hello in group settings. But instead of writing the person off, you try to win them over. Great question!

Are you single and looking for love? Are you finding it hard to meet the right person? Life as a single person offers many rewards, such as being free to pursue your own hobbies and interests, learning how to enjoy your own company, and appreciating the quiet moments of solitude. For many of us, our emotional baggage can make finding the right romantic partner a difficult journey. Perhaps you grew up in a household where there was no role model of a solid, healthy relationship and you doubt that such a thing even exists. You could be attracted to the wrong type of person or keep making the same bad choices over and over, due to an unresolved issue from your past.

The 5 (And Only 5) Reasons You Haven’t Found Love Yet

Bailey's self-help book is definitely worth reading if you're a small business owner or aspire to be one in the near future. He focuses more on the creative aspects of business and provides some As far as self help books go this one is pretty good. The author is a successful owner of his own creative service business, and sometimes it's difficult to buy into his optimism when you consider how Preston Bailey. When you run a creative service business, you face a unique set of challenges. How do I make a living with my art?

If you tend to be an anxious person like me, remember that although careful thought and planning is good, you can't allow fear of failure to stop you from acting. If you find yourself making lots of excuses not to take the next step—my personal  Preston Bailey - - ‎Business & Economics.

Before you can post or reply in these forums, please join our online community. Then one day it just changed, I started to get picked on, laughed at and left out. Fast forward 3 years and I don't have any friends.

10 Simple Ways to Make People Like You More

Snapchat is one of the most unique and engaging social media platforms out there. The premise is simple: post photos and videos that expire within 24 hours, or send them privately to a contact and they'll expire after viewing. Plus, the service offers plenty of fun filters to enhance your posts — from dog ears to floating hearts — and even geotags to commemorate special events or locations you visit.

How to know if someone blocked you on Facebook

You have a low propensity to trust — Our propensity to trust is based on many factors, chief among them being our personality, early childhood role models and experiences, beliefs and values, culture, self-awareness and emotional maturity. The combination of these factors and experiences shapes how quickly, and how much trust we extend to others. Even then, you may only extend trust grudgingly or in small amounts.

Christian Smith , Patricia Snell.


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“Why Don’t People Like Me?” – 9 Reasons People Don’t Want To Be Your Friend


Comments: 1
  1. Tolabar

    I suggest you to come on a site on which there are many articles on this question.

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